Photo courtesy of Sunshine Academy 

You log in for a quick scroll and there it is. 

A perfectly packed bento lunch. 

A mom in matching outfits with her smiling kids. 

A home that looks like a Pottery Barn catalog, but with a sensory bin in every corner. 

And just like that, you start to wonder… 

Am I doing enough? 

Let me stop you right there. 

Social media isn’t real life. 

It’s curated. Filtered. Highlighted. And while there’s nothing wrong with celebrating sweet moments, it can create this impossible picture of what a “good parent” is supposed to look like. 

Let’s bust a few of those myths, shall we? 

Lie #1: Good parents are always calm, patient, and emotionally balanced. 

Reality? Good parents lose their cool sometimes. They cry. They snap. They feel overwhelmed. And they keep showing up. 

It’s not our job to model perfection, it’s our job to model what it looks like to fail, take a breath, own it, and try again. That’s how kids learn resilience. That’s how they learn forgiveness, humility, and emotional honesty. They don’t need flawless; they need real. 

And here’s something else to think about when we feel emotionally off, many of us reach for what some call “artificial Xanax.” Scrolling endlessly. Filling our schedules so we don’t have to sit still. Snacking when we’re not hungry. Pouring a drink when we’re not actually thirsty. 

We call it self-care, but more often, it’s self-avoidance. 

So, here’s the hard but healing question: 

What feeling are you trying to avoid? 

And what would happen if you faced it with honesty and grace? 

Because when we learn to notice our own triggers, our children learn to navigate theirs, and that’s the kind of emotional modeling that truly matters. 

Lie #2: Good parents create magical, enriching activities every day. 

Listen, a cute, themed activity is easy to love.. But let’s be honest, if you’re doing parenting right, you’re not always going to get applause from your kids. In fact, you’ll probably hear: 

• “I’m bored.” 
• “So-and-so’s mom lets them…” 
• “You NEVER do anything fun.” 

Sound familiar? 

Here’s the truth: kids thrive with boundaries, structure, space to be bored, and freedom to figure things out. Social media may make it look like successful parenting means a Pinterest-perfect activity for every hour of the day, but most of the good stuff happens in the quiet in-between moments. 

Boredom is a gift. That’s when imagination kicks in. That’s when children figure out what they enjoy, what they're curious about, and how to entertain themselves without a screen or someone else telling them what to do. 

And when your child starts to compare you to their friend’s parents? That’s your cue to remember: you are their safe place, not their cruise director. It’s okay, no, it’s healthy, for kids to feel a little disappointed, to be told “no,” and to have time that isn’t structured or “Instagrammable.” 

You’re not doing it wrong if they’re complaining. You’re doing it right.  

Lie #3: Good parents love every minute. 

Oh, this one might be the most damaging of all. 

Because let’s be real: parenting can be miserable sometimes. 

The life you had before the spontaneous nights out, sleeping in, drinking coffee while it’s hot is gone, at least for now. You're chronically sleep-deprived, sick with whatever your child brought home from daycare this week, and surrounded by messes no one else seems to notice. 

And as if that weren’t enough, every decision you make is up for public debate: 

• Work full time? Selfish. 
• Stay home? Wasting your potential. 
• Bottle-feed? Shame. 
• Breastfeed too long? Shame. 
• Discipline? Too harsh. Too soft. Too outdated. Too progressive. 
• It’s exhausting. 

So, let’s say this as clearly as possible: you can love your child deeply and still not love every second of raising them. That doesn’t make you ungrateful. That makes you human. 

The goal isn’t to enjoy every moment: it’s to stay in it with love, honesty, and as much grace as you can muster on the hard days. 

Here’s the truth: 

Your child doesn’t care what your feed looks like. 

They care if you listen when they talk. 

If you show up when they fall apart. 

If you make them feel safe in their big emotions. 

That’s what good parenting looks like. 

So, the next time you find yourself scrolling and spiraling, try this: 

• Ask: Is this inspiring me… or pressuring me? 
• Remind yourself: That post is a moment, not the whole story. 
• Shut it down and go be present ,— not perfect. 

Because you don’t need matching outfits. 

You don’t need theme days and hand-stitched Valentines. 

You don’t need social media’s version of parenting. 

You just need to be you. Showing up, doing your best, and loving your child in a way no one else can. 

About the Author 

Sara Schreiner is the owner of The Sunshine Academy, a certified parenting coach, and a dedicated advocate for early childhood education. With years of experience in the childcare industry, she has helped parents navigate the joys and challenges of raising over a thousand children in Yellowstone County. Her expertise in early learning, child development, and family support makes her a trusted resource for parents seeking guidance in choosing high-quality childcare. 

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